I’ve been reading a lot lately about just showing up for our lives even when we’re afraid, not ready, don’t feel like it, and so on. I’ve been so inspired the past few days by Glennon Doyle Melton’s Sacred Scared series on Momastery.com. This series focused on people accomplishing great things in spite (maybe because of?) huge fears.
I don’t know about y’all, but sometimes it takes hearing something literally hundreds of times, if not even more, before it starts to sorta maybe kinda sink in, before I start to really get it. We don’t think we should work that way. We hear something that makes sense to us and we go, “okay, yeah, I can do that. I got that.” But then we don’t do it. I’m talking right now about perfectionism. I have known for years, my whole life perhaps, that it’s better to just do things imperfectly than not to do them because I’m afraid they won’t be perfect. But I am only just now starting to really GET it.
And so I write this, on my phone, a few minutes before I have to leave to pick up my daughter from preschool. I’m still just as much a mess as ever. I don’t have it together. I’m not ready to write great stuff. But I’ll probably never feel ready. I didn’t wait until I felt ready to have kids, because I knew I’d probably never feel ready. But I really wanted kids, so I just jumped in. And I’m far from a perfect parent, but I certainly don’t regret having kids. Likewise, I’m sure I’ll never regret just writing anyway. Just writing this post has made me want to do a little fist pump to all these fellow Starbucks drinkers. Oh yeah, Starbucks drinkers. I’m doing it anyway. I’m slopping it down, and I hope to throw more slop down again as soon as possible. I’ve never been good at cleaning anyway, why should my mental output be any different?